Inner Beauty is it's Own Kind of Beauty

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I have a confession to make - I haven't felt like myself lately. I tallied it up to saying that I was just exhausted because of my job in retail, but I'm starting to think that is just an excuse. I decided to look to see where I'm spending most of my time and I think I've found the problem. My time feels so limited when I'm not at work, but what is really true is that I don't spend my time doing anything worthwhile. I spend time on facebook, instagram, shopping for clothes, or things for the house, decorating the house or just being lazy. The time I've been spending with God has not been sufficient in my life. I wonder why I don't feel like myself, but I don't even know who I am at the moment. How can I know who I am... how can I possibly know who I am if I'm missing the biggest piece of my life?

When I think about the things that have consumed me such as gossip, anger, impatience, hostility, I start to cringe, because that's not anything of who I am . But then I remembered something… It's okay to be broken. It's okay to admit that we are broken. It's okay to admit that we have been broken. Our life on this earth is all about God breaking us so that he can build us up stronger. If we are not broken God cannot heal us. If we are not empty God cannot fill us with all of his goodness. Having a strong relationship with God is the only thing we should strive for. If everything is right with God, everything else in your life will fall together perfectly. This is something I have a very difficult time trusting, because I'm such control person and it stresses me out when I trust somebody else to control. Usually, I don't trust people to do as good of a job as I would do, because when my name is on something I want it to be the absolute best! But if the person that you're trusting is God, I know  He would ALWAYS give a hundred and ten percent. God would never ever ever do something halfway.

So thankfully, my friends had a Bible study last night. The bible study was amazing. It talked about getting all of the bad things out of your life. And not holding on to bad habits or the negative part of yourself. But while the Bible study was happening, my eyes lingered to a verse nearby... the verse read....

 "Don't depend on things like fancy hairdos or gold jewelry or expensive clothes to make you look beautiful. Be beautiful in your heart by being gentle and quiet. This kind of beauty will last, and God considers it very special." 1 Peter 3:3-4

 It reminded me that all of these things that are consuming me are worldy. They are not of the Lord. It doesn't matter if you have the most expensive clothing, perfume, and jewelry... if you have a bad attitude... No one is going to want to be around you. And one more thing - they sure won't know that you are a christian. So I have decided that in 2014... instead of coveting what other people have, or being upset that I don't have or can't have, or focusing so much on what's decorating my house, or who posted what on facebook... instead of ALL of those things - I am going to focus on my faith. I want my relationship with God to grow stronger. I hope that you all will join me in changing our inner beauty. Because the more we focus on what's on the outside, the more we are going to lose on the inside. We need more love, more joy, more peace, more patience, more kindness, more goodness, more faithfulness, more gentleness, and more self-control.

 Here's to 2014 and everything GOOD on the inside. :)

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