Finding Less of Me

Ok so this blog is going to be from the heart becase it is genuinely a spur-of-the-moment piece. I was sitting in our living room last night just venting to Justin about everything I feel is going "wrong" in my life. (and yes, I realize I have a great life, but sometimes it's a whole lot easier to focus on the bad than the good) So, as we were talking, I realized that I use the phrase "If I could just... (fill in the blank here...)" sooooo often! It seems like everytime I get stuck in a spot I don't like, I find some excuse for getting out. It's like I have to pin down the problem, and sometimes, I just don't know how. Now, I don't know if you have ever found yourself in the "If I could just's...", but it's time for us to step away from - If I could just finish school - If I could just find a job - If we could just get married - If I could just make more money - If I could just find a boyfriend - If I could just move out...

Ok so I've been guilty and haven't posted in a while, and trust me, it's not because I'm not inspired, it's just because I haven't had the time. But the other day I was reading my devotional and I had a point hit me really hard, so I thought I'd share. Have you ever heard somebody say that you should "fear God"? I've heard it all of my life and I have never quite understood it. To fear something is to be afraid of something in my vocabulary. But when I think of God, I think of someone strong, mighty, someone who is always there for me and will always always relieve my stress when I feel like the world is caving in. And that description sounds more like a comforting family dog than someone I should be afraid of. But then the other day when I was reading my devotion, it said that you are not supposed to fear God or be afraid of Him, because if we were afraid of him we wouldn't talk to him daily, we wouldn't want to be around him, and ...